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Sunday, December 09, 2012

Day 9 - "Hard Candy Christmas" from The Best Little Whorehouse In Texas - 25 Days of Christmas Angst

Look, a little, old-fashioned store front decorated
for Christmas.  Maybe they sell penny candy?
Though today's song comes from The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, I will avoid some of the R-rated commentary I would like to make. 

"Hard Candy Christmas" is sung in the movie when all of the women of the brothel are depressed because they have to leave The Chicken Ranch.  This song is really the only connection this movie has to Christmas.  You can see the scene from the movie here:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PCguQ1_wqVM.  The full film is also available on Netflix streaming.

I heard this song long before I knew about the movie it came from which was also long before I would have understood the getting it on that was going on in the movie.

As a child, I really didn't even get what a "hard candy Christmas" meant.  I thought it had something to do with broken candy.  I associated the song with those awful tasting candy ribbons that broke too easily and that usually cut your tongue because the sides of the pieces would dissolve down to sharp knife edges in your mouth.

Looking at this song now, I realize that it contains two of the most valuable lessons from my mother:  "Take what you get and be happy with it" and "Life isn't fair."

I must have been eight or nine the first time I learned these lessons.  I opened a present from my grandparents and immediately said, "is this all?"  I remember getting slapped by Mom.  If I wasn't actually slapped I somehow gained the new knowledge that my words could hurt someone; this was a valuable lesson.

Preview the remaining days of angst or review the previous days here:   
http://www.carneylentz.com/p/25-days-of-christmas-angst.html

Mom helped to squelch the seeds of greed that were taking root and planted instead a concern for other people's feelings.  A similar lesson happened when I pointed out that a cousin had more gifts to open than I did.  These experiences made me a better human being but they have not helped me to be better at receiving presents.

I am very clumsy at receiving presents.  Most of the time the gift is nothing I would want and I therefore have to fake gratitude in order to watch out for the other person's feelings.  If the present is something I really wanted, I never feel worthy and my "thank you" is awkward and uncomfortable while feeling entirely inadequate.

So, I am also a reluctant and awkward present giver.  Out of financial necessity, I have gotten away from the habit of buying all my family members a Christmas present.  This doesn't mean I don't buy things for my family members.  I simply buy things for people when I know it is something they will appreciate or use and when I can afford it.  I give it to them immediately.

Mom taught me lessons about receiving gifts.  Colleen taught me the only rule you need for giving gifts.  "Do not give anything you will regret giving; never expect anything in return."  I do not give out of any sense of obligation nor do I give to try to influence someone.  My favorite way of giving is to do so anonymously.

I love when something good comes to me out of the blue because it seems like the world is trying to give me a little encouragement and more importantly I don't have to deal with my awkwardness at receiving the present.  Any giving I do; I try to recreate that feeling for the person receiving the gift.

"Hard Candy Christmas" is about accepting what fate, a friend, or chance has brought to you as a bonus in life.  It is also about accepting that life often leaves you with very little.  Sometimes you just have to appreciate the bag of penny candy you can afford, especially if you don't have a chicken to exchange for anything else.

Hard Candy Christmas
from The Best Little Whorehouse In Texas

Hey, maybe I'll dye my hair.
Maybe I'll move somewhere.
Maybe I'll get a car.
Maybe I'll drive so far.
They'll all lose track.
Me, I'll bounce right back.

Maybe I'll sleep real late.
Maybe I'll lose some weight.
Maybe I'll clear my junk.
Maybe I'll just get drunk on apple wine.
Me, I'll be just

Fine and Dandy.
Lord it's like a hard candy Christmas.
I'm barely getting through tomorrow,
But still I won't let
Sorrow bring me way down.

I'll be fine and dandy.
Lord it's like a hard candy Christmas.
I'm barely getting through tomorrow,
But still I won't let
Sorrow bring me way down.

Hey, maybe I'll learn to sew.
Hey, Maybe I'll just lie low.
Maybe I'll hit the bars.
Maybe I'll count the stars until the dawn.
Me, I will go on.

Maybe I'll settle down.
Maybe I'll just leave town.
Maybe I'll have some fun.
Maybe I'll meet someone
And make him mine.
Me, I'll be just

Fine and dandy.
Lord it's like a hard candy Christmas.
I'm barely getting through tomorrow,
But still I won't let
Sorrow bring me way down.

I'll be fine and dandy.
Lord it's like a hard candy Christmas.
I'm barely getting through tomorrow,
But still I won't let
Sorrow bring me way down.

I'll be fine and dandy.
Lord it's like a hard candy Christmas.
I'm barely getting through tomorrow,
But still I won't let
Sorrow bring me way down.

I'll be fine and dandy.
Lord it's like a hard candy Christmas.
I'm barely getting through tomorrow,
But still I won't let
Sorrow bring me way down.

I'll be fine and dandy.
Lord it's like a hard candy Christmas.
I'm barely getting through tomorrow,
But still I won't let
Sorrow bring me way down.

I'll be fine.
I'll be fine.
I'll be fine.

Resources:

Lyrics
http://www.dollyon-line.com/archives/lyrics/hardcandy.shtml

"Hard Candy Christmas"
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hard_Candy_Christmas
 

25 Days Of Christmas Angst
Day Song Download/Purchase Info
9 "Hard Candy Christmas" from The Best Little Whorehouse In Texas Buy the full album:

Buy the song:

Buy the DVD:

Amazon Instant Video:
How does a brothel full of prostitutes singing about what they might do to move past a depressing time that tap into the Christmas spirit?
8 "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer" by Dr. Elmo Buy the full album:

Buy the song:

Buy the cartoon inspired by this song:
Read my blog post for more about this song.
Santa is like the rest of us, capable of both good and evil.
7 "What's This" from The Nightmare Before Christmas Buy the full album:

Buy the song:

Buy the DVD:

Buy the Blu-Ray:

Amazon Instant Video:
Read my blog post for more about this song.
This song captures how we are supposed to approach the season with childlike wonder and then destroy it with greed.
6 "O Tannenbaum" by Henry Lowman FREE! Read my blog post for more about this song.
Get this free album from C. B. Gitty Crafter Supply. There are other Christmas cigar box guitar albums discussed here.

Click this link to preview the remaining days of angst or review the previous days:  http://www.carneylentz.com/p/25-days-of-christmas- angst.html
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